Cc. Antya 1.142

Text

ekasya śrutam eva lumpati matiṁ kṛṣṇeti nāmākṣaraṁ
sāndronmāda-paramparām upanayaty anyas ya vaṁśī-kalaḥ
eṣa snigdha-ghana-dyutir manasi me lagnaḥ paṭe vīkṣaṇāt
kaṣṭaṁ dhik puruṣa-traye ratir abhūn manye mṛtiḥ śreyasī

Synonyms

ekasya—of one person; śrutam—heard; eva—certainly; lumpati—take away; matim—the mind; krsna iti—Kṛṣṇa; nama-akṣaram—the letters of the name; sāndra-unmada—of intense madness; paramparām—a shower; upanayati—brings; anyasya—of another; vamsi-kalah—the sound vibration of the flute; eṣaḥ—this third one; snigdha—giving love; ghana-dyutiḥ—lightninglike effulgence; manasi—in the mind; me—My; lagnaḥ—attachment; pate—in the picture; vīkṣaṇāt—by seeing; kastam dhik—oh, shame upon Me; purusa-traye—to three persons; ratiḥ—attachment; abhūt—has appeared; manye—I think; mṛtiḥ—death; sreyasi—better. 

Translation

Experiencing previous attachment to Kṛṣṇa [pūrva-rāga], Śrīmatī Rādhārāṇī thought: “Since I have heard the name of a person called Kṛṣṇa, I have practically lost My good sense. Then, there is another person who plays His flute in such a way that after I hear the vibration, intense madness arises in My heart. And again there is still another person to whom My mind becomes attached when I see His beautiful lightning effulgence in His picture. Therefore I think that I am greatly condemned, for I have become simultaneously attached to three persons. It would be better for Me to die because of this.” 

Purport

This verse is from Vidagdha-mādhava (2.9). 

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